When You Feel Irrelevant as a Stay-At-Home Mom

Being a stay-at-home mom can be really hard.

It’s oft-said, but worth repeating.  I mean, there are great things about it.  For instance, if I don’t feel like wearing make-up or putting on anything nice, I don’t have to.  I can spend my down time doing, really, whatever I want.  After all, the world won’t fall apart if I spend naptime watching a movie and eating popcorn instead of cleaning.

And, of course, I get to experience every second of my son growing up (even those I might prefer to miss, like teething.)

I’m not big on doing things purely for the applause, I’m really not… but there’s something about being married to a LEO that makes stay-at-home mom life seem particularly hum-drum.

The Best Way to Concealed Carry in LuLaRoe

Hey guys!  I’ve wanted to share with you some ideas for how to make concealed carry work while still wearing feminine clothes… but truth be told I’m currently working on finding a concealed carry class (and time to take it, which is much harder than finding the class itself right now!)

Ashley is a friend I met through the Sheepdog Mamas Facebook group and when she talked about how she carries while still wearing LuLaRoe, I knew I had to ask if she’d be willing to write a guest post.

I’m so excited to share this with you, so without further ado, here’s her post!

30 Things To Do With Your Kids Today

Growing up, I never envisioned myself being a stay-at-home mom.  I always had a lot of ideas for what I wanted to be when I grew up, and while I wanted kids, I also didn’t know if I’d ever have them.

The reason behind this is, as much as I liked the idea of having kids, I wasn’t sure I’d be any good with them.  Kids annoyed me. And don’t get me started on babies.  I had no idea what to do with them, even months before giving birth. If they cried, I panicked and they went right back to their mom.

Luckily, maternal instinct is definitely real and kicked in almost immediately after I gave birth to my son.

Nonetheless, I still sometimes struggle.  I’m an introvert, so I love having my own space, and I’m not a naturally “goofy” person that kids love.  I have to actively figure out things to do with A throughout the day to keep us both busy, and to keep me from going crazy.

What You Should Be Saying Behind Your Husband’s Back

One piece of wisdom I heard a lot growing up was, “don’t talk about people behind their backs.”  You don’t want to be rude, for one thing, and you don’t want to lose the confidence of those you’re talking to.  Because, of course, if you’re gossiping about someone else, the person to whom you’re gossiping is soon going to realize you’re bound to do the same thing to them.

You also don’t want these negative things getting back to the person you’re talking about.  I can guarantee a secondhand rendition of what you’ve said is going to sound a lot worse, and hearing it this way is going to hurt the person’s feelings even more.

Benefits of Working On The Weekends

I’m not going to lie: one thing that can be hard as a police wife is that “normal” weekends are a thing of the past.

This is also true if you work retail, which has definitely been true for both of us before.  If you want to do anything on a Saturday or Sunday, it takes some strategic planning… but for the most part, if your husband works the weekends, it’ll just be you and the kids on your own.

I worked all through college, so most of my work hours were on the weekend, and at the time, it sucked.  I had a hard time seeing friends get to do fun things on Saturdays while I was stuck inside bagging groceries.  Even after graduation, I couldn’t get full weekends off by nature of working in a retail environment.

But that experience has paid off because by now, it’s normal to me.

15 Random Acts of Kindness for Police – Guest Post

This past Friday, my most recent contribution to My Joy-Filled Life was published.  Yay!

My newest post was inspired by some of my friends and family.  I’ve gotten a lot of messages from them asking how they can support their local law enforcement.  They’ve said they couldn’t figure out a way to show appreciation that doesn’t come off as bribery, that officers can enjoy without worrying that the treats have been tampered with, and that they could actually get to police officers (since, as you know, they’re constantly on the move.)

3 Things To Remember When Your Husband Cancels Again

It’s 5:00.  The babysitter is on her way, you’re all dressed up, and now all you have left to do is wait for your husband to get home from work.

You’re so excited for this date night.  Things have been rough, and you’ve needed some time together, not to mention some time away from the kids and your normal responsibilities.

That’s when you get the text: he’s cancelling again because he got held up at work. Again.  He says it looks like it’s going to be an all-nighter.

Again.

You sigh, call the babysitter to tell her the plans have changed, change back into more comfortable clothes, and hope the kids go to bed easily tonight, because you’re just so not in the mood to put up with any crankiness or whining.  You spend the rest of the evening fuming.

Does this sound at all familiar?

Fighting the Good Fight: The 8 Elements of a Good, Clean Fight

I wrote this past Monday about why you shouldn’t be afraid to fight with your spouse, but with the caveat that you need to have a good fight, not a screaming match or a series of put-downs or other negative behaviors.

Fighting is part of communication, and it can be a healthy part of a marriage, as long as you learn how to do it right. 

Don’t Be Afraid to Fight (And What Should Scare You)

When two people come together to be “one flesh”, it’s not always happily ever after.  Actually, it’s often not peaceful and without conflict, especially in the early years.  Throughout your marriage, you’ll have to learn how to mesh your expectations, wants, needs, and desires.  It’s a lifelong struggle, but you get better at it with practice.

Because it takes practice, you can’t come together without a fight here and there.  It’s just a part of the process of growing to better understand and be able to express yourself to your spouse.

When you realize fighting isn’t a symptom of a bad marriage but a feature of a healthy one seeking improvement, it’s not quite so scary.  So why is fighting sometimes considered a “four letter word”?

How to Cope With The War on Cops As A Police Wife

I’ll be honest, my heart hasn’t really been into blogging lately.  I’m glad I’ve had some posts pre-written for the next few weeks, because I’m just troubled by the current war against police.  I know I’ve needed to write something on the topic, but I hadn’t really been able to figure out how.

I actually wrote an entire post that I ended up deleting, because I just didn’t feel up to getting into the politics of the situation.  It was written out of anger, outrage, and hurt, and that’s never a good place to write from.  Nonetheless, if you’re searching for my opinion on the matter, here it is.

Police officers put their lives on the line every day. They deserve our love and support.  They deserve the benefit of the doubt, and the right to being innocent until proven guilty.  If they kill a criminal who has put their lives in imminent danger, it’s sad.  It’s sad when people die.  But the fault lies in those who break the law, not those who swear to uphold it and keep that promise. Those who target police officers are nothing short of terrorists, and should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

That’s all I’m going to say on the matter until something moves me otherwise.  I think that’s the most loving way I can put that.

Aside from the politics of the situation, the daily life of LEO wives is different.  All through his career, you’ve known danger and death were a possibility.  Every day, he’s put his life on the line.  Now, it’s different.  Now, death and danger feel suddenly imminent and not like just a mere possibility.